everything

I am no longer used to staying up late.  after 7am classes four days a week, my body is no longer atuned to late nights for studying or reading or partying.

and the thing about it that’s so difficult now is that I think better and more clearly at night, and I need to be able to think in order to finish this fcking review or related literature.  and I can’t because in between epiphanies and idea-expressing progress is the strong instinct to go to sleep.

I used to finish five-page academic papers in a matter of hours (late evening to early morning hours, to be specific) but now my thought process is interrupted by my eyelids falling shut in the middle of a sentence.

if I had the physical capacity to pull an all-nighter tonight, I would rather do that than work on this chapter all day tomorrow.

there are too many distractions in the daytime.  and too many opportunities to take a break that starts at five minutes and somehow spans into two hours.

and it’s nighttime and I am a nighttime person and I am just so frustrated agh.